Monday, October 27, 2014

Thankful

Sometimes it is so nice to hear only the click of the keyboard and the moist shrug of the Keurig machine as I sit down after work. My feet hurt and my face is sweaty feeling as I kept forgetting to adjust the heater in my classroom. My students now call me "Mrs. Culby" and I am a bit ridiculous in my love-dovey "newly married" frame of mind right now -- I get that. My life feels precious and sweet and freeing and soft...like freshly washed sheets that are the just right amount of cold when you get in. I won't pretend that I haven't had my own share of struggles -- I certainly have. But, there are days when things align and your spirit, and emotions, and body feel so well-connected that it just makes me want to run, or organize, or...write. Maybe even all 3.

So, here's a thankful list. My first one since getting married...maybe it will look different.

My husband (woop, there it is)
My little home (the cutest little place in the fall!)
Grace and forgiveness 
Understanding
LOVE
My hope chest turned coffee table 
My in-laws
My nieces!
Attending a church where I hear God's love for me EVERY SINGLE WEEK (so important for me)
Seeing my husband walk in from work with a smile on his face
My wooden cutting board
My glass pitcher
Holding my strong husband's hand
My new school and students
HOPE
FREEDOM
JOY
Mountains
Spatulas
Trips with the hubs
Having a husband who plans fun, creative dates
Seeing my friends get married and have babies
My sister, my "Little One"
My brother and sis-in law
Parents who are supportive, helpful, and always ready to listen
Friends who are faithful, helpful, and loving in the most beautiful way
Memories of a sweet wedding, and smiling at the future I know God has planned.
The HOPE and UTTER JOY that comes from knowing that God's best for my husband and me is YET TO COME. 





Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Update

Ten months of not writing.

I admit I have put off updating the blog for various purposes, like:
  • I forgot 
  • I was busy with teaching high school and passing SAFE-T
  • I was busy trying to catch up on How I Met Your Mother with the roommates (crucial.)
  • I was busy meeting and dating the best man in the world (amazing.)
  • I was busy planning a wedding (glad it's done!)
  • I was busy looking for a middle school teaching job 
  • I was busy moving out of the duplex and back into my parents’ house for 3 weeks 
  • I was busy working with my fiance to prepare his house for me (he was a saint)
  • I was busy getting married (and loving every minute!)
And, so, here I am.

You won’t be shocked to hear that I received a lot of advice about marriage before I got married, and much of it was godly, experienced wisdom from people I love and look up to. And all of it was so, so right. Now that I am on the very slight “other side” of things (meaning, I am now married instead of unmarried), I have realized one crucial piece of wisdom about marriage:

Now that I am married, Satan is going to try his very best to destroy my marriage because he knows that if we are fiercely protecting and investing in our marriage and following God’s will, we can do great and powerful things for God. And, that possibility threatens his plan for evil and it scares him. So, he will do ANYTHING he can to ruin our marriage.


There is no need for me to mention statistically how marriages are doing, we all know the numbers. So, I am learning to be ultra-aware of Satan’s lies, his attempts to draw me away from my husband, plain and simple. I am not naïve enough to think that my love and adoration for my husband is enough to protect me from Satan’s lies and thus protect our marriage. It isn't because I don’t love and adore him, I DO so very much. But, if I simply rely on my love and adoration, I am only relying on my own strength, which is directly against what scripture tells me to do. Scripture says I am to rely on God’s strength.

 Therefore, by clinging to Christ, I cling to my husband. By submitting to God’s will, I submit to my husband (and vice versa). By knowing God and loving his word, my love and commitment to my husband grows. I am so very new in all of this and I am sure there is some fault to my learning at this point. But, one thing I do know, is that I cannot be an encouraging, strong, loving wife to my husband unless I seek an outside source of strength. Satan’s lies dry me out of any type of love and commitment and, in turn, fill me up with fear, resentment, self-protection, and doubt. God’s truth enlivens me, strengthens me, wisens (let’s pretend that’s a word) me, and grows us together.

Proverbs 4:23 has taken on new meaning for me as I have been married.

“Guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”


Everything I do flows from the pursuits, focus, and interests of my heart. Everything. So, if what I am around could possibly affect my pursuits, focus, and interests, then I want to be careful with what I allow my heart to encounter. What I invest my thoughts and time in will affect my marriage, most definitely

One way I can protect my marriage is to guard my heart against Satan's attempts to distract me.

All this is to say is that I have so very much to learn, but God is starting to piece together an understanding of my new life as a married lady and I am trying my best to listen and understand.

So, hello. I am back and I hope to be a more frequent update-er as much as time permits.


Oh, and I really really love being a Mrs. to the best man for me.